


Demons from the Past

by fabledexile



Series: Our Ward [1]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Dubious Ethics, Dubious Morality, F/M, Fingerfucking, M/M, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sex Toys, Verbal Abuse, Verbal Humiliation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-05
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-01-11 08:10:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1170729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fabledexile/pseuds/fabledexile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ward's past relationship with Ian Quinn and how he escaped it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When Demons Wake

**Author's Note:**

> This will very quickly become NC-17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ward has trouble coping when Ian Quinn comes back into his life. He remembers the good...and the bad. All the very very bad.

A small part of Ward screamed. Agent Ward shunted that part of himself as deep as he could, slamming a door behind it. Now was not the time- too much to do, to far to go.

He’d never told the team about it- never wanted to- though he was sure they’d understand...and maybe already knew. Everyone had demons. And now Ian Quinn had reappeared in his life and Ward wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle it.

It was easy to keep from being alone at first, so ludicrously easy with five lovers. He refused to go to sub-mode, and none of his lovers pushed him to it. Not that their missions gave them much time anyway.

…

It was going on three weeks and he could feel himself fraying at the edges a little, needing the peace of being dominated and taken care of. But that way led to nightmares and demons he’d thought he’d left behind years ago. 

He woke up from a nightmare he couldn’t remember. His heart pounding and his entire body ready to move. He rolled out of bed making Jemma start awake. 

“What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

He forced himself to be calm and light, “Fine. Sorry. Need a drink.”

He left her there and hurried down the hall. The small screaming part of him was swimming towards the surface and he’d held it at bay to long, there was no pushing it back down. He closed the door on the holding cell and went to the farthest corner and sat down. He unlocked the door in his head and screamed. 

And screamed. 

And screamed.


	2. Beginning Are Such Sweet Sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Ward and Ian Quinn got together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NC-17

Ward had always been a good fighter, from his first karate class at the local Y, he’d excelled at it. Now he was the personal bodyguard of one of the richest, most powerful, sexiest men in the world. 

It had been so good at first. A good job, good pay. Then slowly Ian had started asking him to join him for meals and to sit instead of stand. He was slow and patient with Ward, knowing that if he wasn’t careful he’d scare him. 

Ward was in love with the older man, it had crept up on him and now it was to late, he was head over heels.

Their first time together was Ward’s first experience with another man. Quinn was careful and gently when Ward needed it, and hard and fast when he needed that. It was so good.

Ward liked that he had physical control over Quinn in the outside world and that Quinn took control of him in the bedroom. Ward had absolute authority when it came to Quinn’s safety, if Ward said move, Quinn moved. There was a lot of trust there. 

That lent itself well to the bedroom. Quinn returned that trust, teaching Ward all about pleasure and submission. It started simple, being blindfolded, being tied up- loosely enough that he could escape if he really wanted to, which he didn’t. Then there was Quinn’s plethora of toys, whips and paddles, shock wands and vibrators.

Quinn exposed Ward to all of it, and Ward loved it. He was still so young, able to bounce back from anything Quinn threw at him, loving the shock and surprise on Quinn’s face when he got hard again so soon after being tortured into cumming. Quinn would laugh and kiss him and fuck him senseless.

Slowly their bedroom games started to bleed into their work lives. Ward woke up one morning to feel Quinn fucking him and cumming deep in his ass. Then he took a butt plug and slid it into Ward.

“What-?”

Quinn kissed him, “I want you to keep that inside you all day.”

“Ian we’re working, don’t be ridiculous.”

Quinn nipped Ward’s neck and slid the plug in and out of him a couple times making Ward moan.

“Please, for me? It would be so hot knowing you’re walking around with my cum inside you. I’m getting hard just thinking about it. See?”

He rubbed against Ward and Ward COULD feel how hard he was.

“We’re in the office all day today, all you have to do is stand at the door, no outside meetings or clients, no one you couldn’t deal with in your sleep.”

He hadn’t stopped fucking the plug in and out of Ward and Ward couldn’t concentrate enough to object.

“Say you’ll do it and I’ll let you cum.”

“Yes! YES! Alright! I’ll do it!”

Quinn shoved the plug deep into Ward and grabbed the leaking cock and Ward came all over Quinn’s hand.

Quinn grinned and rubbed Ward’s cum into the younger man’s stomach.

“Don’t shower, I love the idea of you covered in cum.”

Ward was too dazed to say anything as Quinn kissed him deeply and bit his lips.

Sex that night had been amazing, tearing to shreds all the doubts and objections Ward had been prepared to make about it NEVER happening again. Quinn was smart, he didn’t suggest anything else like that for a month. Then Ward was waking up to a small vibrator being pushed inside of him and Quinn telling him to leave it in for the day.

Ward did, it was a small thing, barely bigger then a marble, easy to keep in, easy to forget about, until Quinn turned on the remote and it vibrated inside him making Ward gasp and everyone at the conference table turn to look at him. Ward had blushed and turned back towards the door trying to hide his growing problem. He didn't miss the small smile and wink Quinn threw his way.

Ward had been angry when they’d gotten back to the house. Yelling at Quinn that that wasn’t right. Quinn pushed Ward up against the wall and swallowed any further screams with a bruising kiss. He ground their cocks together and pushed down Ward’s pants enough to slide a finger inside him. Ward bucked back onto that finger far to willingly. 

Quinn laughed and spun the younger man around and slid into his favorite hole. Then Quinn turned on the vibrator still inside him and fucked him till Ward came all over the wall. 

Then Quinn was nothing but sweetness as he gently led Ward to the bath and they soaked together. Quinn kissing him and apologizing and Ward couldn’t stay angry and forgave him, even going so far as to admit that it HAD been a little bit hot.

The next week Quinn ordered Ward to lock the door and then asked him to suck him. Ward had adamantly refused at first, now was NOT the time or place. Quinn had taken him and kissed him and licked his neck, begging quietly, telling Ward how hot it would be, right there in the middle of the room. How good Ward’s lips were, how much he needed them.

Ward had acquiesced, of course. He couldn’t deny Quinn anything. He’d gotten on his knees right there and Quinn had gently held his head as Ward sucked him and swallowed. Quinn had praised him and thanked him and Ward glowed at the love.

It started happening more and more till it was an everyday thing. Quinn would order Ward in for a meeting, Ward would lock the door and Quinn would use Ward’s mouth. It became harder and harder as well, less gentle, more Quinn fucking down Ward’s throat making the younger man gag and choke. 

He’d be all apologies afterwards- Ward was just so hot, so good, so amazing. Quinn just needed him so badly, couldn’t stop thinking about him. Maybe if Ward would just let him fuck him over the desk, that would help?’

Ward said no, that was too dangerous. 

One day Quinn ordered Ward under the desk, he had a meeting but he still NEEDED Ward’s mouth on him. That was going to far and Quinn knew it, Ward didn’t even bother saying no, just turned back to go outside. 

Quinn pushed him against the door, his hard, trapped, cock rubbing between Ward’s cheeks, “Get under the desk or I will fuck you right here against the door and everyone outside will hear you.”

“They’ll hear you too.”

“I’m the boss, I can do whatever I want. You’re my bodyguard, the youngest man on the security squad, you don’t think they aren’t all a little jealous of you, of how good you are, how well you get paid? That they wouldn’t LOVE to have something to hold over your head? Getting fucked by the boss, you little slut.”

Ward shivered. He knew all to well how much the rest of the security team hated answering to a boy half their age. It didn’t help that he could take down any of them in a fight, he hadn’t made any friends here. 

“Just get under the desk, it’s a ten minute meeting, twenty tops. I need you so bad, you’re so fucking hot, and your lips, they’re amazing. Please? For me?”

Ward didn’t know how to react; Quinn had gone from domineering to sweet and loving. Ward got under the big desk. Quinn unlocked the door and ushered in his two clients. He came to sit behind the desk and pulled his cock out of his pants.

Ward went to work, sucking and licking as quietly as possible as Quinn had his meeting. Ten minutes later and Quinn’s hand was in Ward’s hair and he pushed Ward all the way down onto his cock, coming down his throat. 

Quinn’s upper body didn’t even shudder as he came, nothing to betray what he was doing as he leaned over and signed some paperwork. Then he pushed Ward back and Ward had to catch himself from hitting the desk as he tried to quietly gasp for breath. 

Then Quinn tucked himself back in his pants and led the clients to the door. Ward heard him lock it and then he was helping Ward out form beneath the desk and pushing him against it and kissing him and nibbling at his neck praising him constantly. He even went so far as to pull down Ward’s pants and give Ward a blowjob of his own.

It kept going like that, Quinn would push past Ward’s objections and limits, then apologize and give Ward amazing sex till Ward stopped objecting. It happened so slowly, the blind obedience, the cessation of saying no because there would be orgasms and release on the other side.

“I’m your boss, do what I tell you.” Became Quinn’s favorite phrase, and made Ward obey instantly.

Every day Ward would spend more and more time under Quinn’s desk being throat fucked and hoping that if he did well enough Quinn would blow him. Most days Quinn found a reason not to reciprocate making Ward try harder the next day and the next day.

Clever Quinn, he was still sweetness and light when they got back home, showing Ward it was all in fun, all in jest. Till it wasn’t.


	3. Lost Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is no more Ward, so how does he get free?

Ward was gone. All that remained was Quinn’s pet, toy, plaything, boy, slut. He lived in a daze of repulsion and need, incapable of pulling himself out of it- not sure he wanted to, and desperately sure that he did- if only he knew how.

He woke up every morning being used. Quinn’s cock invading his mouth or ass, whatever wasn’t being used usually filled with a toy or fingers or a liquid. He was never sure if he’d wake up being able to move or if Quinn would have drugged his last drink so the bastard could play with his prone body.

He was never empty anymore: Quinn’s cock, a plug, beads, a piece of ginger…or something else even less comfortable. He hated it all, and yet any time he was empty it was like an itch inside him he had to scratch and he would beg for Quinn to fill him again, no matter how much he hated it- he needed it even more.

His job as bodyguard was a joke now. If there was someone else in the office Ward stood behind Quinn’s chair, always kept uncomfortably hard, barely able to focus on anything as Quinn tortured him with something vibrating inside him.

If no one was in the office his place was under the desk, or over it, depending on Quinn’s mood.

Sometimes Quinn didn’t even take him to work anymore. Just kept him tied to the bed, drugged out and kept hard and aching until Quinn came home and Ward was begging and pleading and swearing to do anything if Quinn would just give him some relief. And Quinn always did, and it was always so good, so desperately needed and Ward couldn’t see leaving the older man who gave him such pleasure, forgetting that it came at such a high price.

*****

The woman had short blonde hair cut into a bob. It was a wig. Even through the haze of needing to be filled and used Ward could still see that. It was a good wig, but he could still tell. 

She was short and dressed like an analyst and moved like a fighter. Ward noticed the perfect balance and unconscious movements of a trained martial artist. He moved incrementally closer to Quinn’s chair. 

DO YOUR JOB DAMMIT! He screamed at himself. He forced himself to focus on the people sitting in front of Quinn’s desk. He slowly loosened his muscles in case he needed to move, trying desperately to ignore the beads moving inside him.

The “analyst” noticed! She locked eyes with him for a fraction of a second. Who ever she was she had seen that he was settling into a stance, ready to lunge forward if necessary. No one should have been able to catch his slow preparation, no one.

Whatever she saw in Ward’s eyes made her frown ever so slightly as she looked back at the proposal in front of her. She didn’t looks at him again until everyone was leaving and she was shaking Quinn’s hand. She gave Ward a hard look that Quinn didn’t notice before following the others out. 

Quinn locked the door with a push of a remote and Ward didn’t need to be told to get on his knees. He reached for Quinn’s cock and Quinn backhanded him viciously.

“Beg for it whore.”

“Please master, give me your cock please. I need it.”

“Where?”

“Fucking me, down my throat, in my ass, whatever pleases you the most master. Please! Please!”

Quinn let Ward fish out his cock and Ward immediately swallowed it. Quinn held him down as the soft cock grew steadily harder and longer in Ward’s throat. Quinn held him there as Ward swallowed around the hard length, hoping that Quinn would pull back before Ward passed out. 

It could go either way. Quinn liked making Ward pass out on his cock and then cum on the younger man’s face as he lay on the ground so that when he woke up he was covered in cum that Quinn made him clean up and swallow.

Quinn pulled back making Ward gasp for air before forcefully fucking back into the waiting mouth. Ward let himself be used and swallowed when he was told to. Then Quinn had Ward over the desk, ass in the air, and he yanked the beads out of Ward making Ward scream with the unexpectedness of his orgasm as the multitude of beads slid past his prostate. 

Then Quinn was spanking him hard, telling him what a dirty little whore he was for cumming without permission and made him lick his own cum off the desk in between begging for forgiveness.

When that was done Quinn ordered Ward to make himself presentable and called for his car. Ward winced at the smirks on the other security men’s faces as he preceded Quinn out of the office to the garage.

Ward assumed everyone knew he was Ian’s slut now- the hair in disarray, the swollen lips, the glazed eyes. He wasn’t always as quiet as he should be when Ian was using him mercilessly in the office.

In the car on the way back to the house Quinn made Ward strip naked, and put a chastity device on his cock. Then he ordered Ward onto his cock and fucked him all the way home. Once inside the garage Quinn ordered Ward to crawl inside on his hands and knees like the little bitch he was. 

Quinn spent the next five hours using his slave like the fuck toy he was and Ward didn’t even have to wonder if the last cup of water he was given was drugged, he knew it would be when Quinn got like this. 

Ward woke up tied to the bed, a blindfold over his eyes, clamps on his nipples, a ball gag in his mouth, a cage on his cock and a plug vibrating in his ass. Quinn had covered his entire body in vapo rub, or icy hot, something with a strong eucalyptus scent that made his nerves scream like they were on fire. 

A sound pulled him a little more out of his fuzzy head space…There was someone in the house! It was hard to tell with the sound of the vibrating plug and his own labored breathing, but he was sure of it. There was someone in the house, quietly going room-to-room and opening door after door as if looking for something. 

It was to early for the maids to be here to clean the house, and the outside staff wouldn’t be anywhere near this wing.

Ward tried to pull out of the bindings, but the softness of the cloth hid metal bindings he couldn’t break. He started to grow frantic, pulling more desperately at the bindings on his arms and legs, thrashing to get free. He finally fell back exhausted by the effort. The drug still very present in his system.

That is when someone walked in. He heard the soft clicking of the door opening and the barely perceptible glide of soft feet over the carpet. He stayed as still as possible, trying to keep the invisible person in his mind’s eye as they moved.

The bed shifted, someone was moving towards him where he lay in the middle of the massive triple king size bed. He didn’t bother trying to move away, hoping that if he pretended to be asleep he could retain some sort of element of surprise. 

“I know you’re awake. I’m going to take off your blindfold.”

Slowly the blindfold came off and Ward opened his eyes to see HER standing in front of him. She wasn’t wearing the wig anymore, her hair was a beautiful rust red that fell to right below her chin. She smiled gently down at him. He was to busy trying to get his brain to catch up to do anything but stare.

“I’m so sorry for this. You’ll forgive me, I promise.”

And with that she stuck a needle in his neck and he fell back into oblivion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I freely admit this series is not my best writing, it's more of needing to get it out, and even that is coming rather hard.
> 
> Slow goings, sorry for that. I've written dozens of little pieces of Ward/Quinn, but nothing is really working the way I want it to. So instead I've skipped over HOW Quinn mind-warped Ward to how he gets free.
> 
> I'll revisit some of the trauma he's had to face, but for right now...


	4. Red Headed Witch Woman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha rescues Ward but Ward doesn't want to be rescued.

His body screamed at how wrong everything felt, and that is what woke him. He tumbled from the small pallet he was laying on. The small red head sat on the floor, her head against the door, just watching him.

Ward’s training kicked in as he catalogued everything within the first five seconds of looking around.

1\. He wasn’t at Quinn’s house anymore.  
2\. He was clean and drug free, so someone had cleaned him up and clothed him.  
3\. The “analyst” didn’t have any weapons on her.  
4\. There was nothing in the room he could use as a weapon, no lamp, no chair.  
5\. He was safe.  
6\. He was desperately empty and needy.

The last thing hit him hard and he doubled over on himself. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d spent more then 10 minutes without something inside his hole, reminding him of his place.

He sank to the floor breathing hard, “Where’s Ian? What did you do to him? I n- I need him, now please, please give him back!”

When was the last time he’d made a decision on his own? When to eat, when to sleep, when to relieve himself? He hadn’t had a thought of his own in months and now it was hard to breath.

The red head didn’t move from her place on the floor. She just watched him as he went into a full-blown panic attack. He moved to lunge at her. She slid an inch to the right and he slammed into the door. He fell to the floor beside her, to far-gone to try anything else. Tears streamed down his face and he dry heaved next to her. She put a cooling hand on his forehead and held him as he wretched and shook. 

When his arms couldn’t hold him anymore he collapsed into a fetal position, his head some how ending up in her lap. He fell back asleep just like that.

*****

He woke up on the pallet again- the feeling of knowing something was horribly wrong. No one was abusing his body and fucking with his mind. It was blissfully quiet but he wasn’t bound or gagged or blindfolded. He was in complete control of his entire body. It was so so wrong!

He tumbled off the pallet again, and again the red head was sitting on the floor just watching him, for all he knew she hadn’t moved. 

“Who are you? Where am I? Where’s Ian? What do you want with me?”

She didn’t answer, just looked at him. This time his lunge was better balanced, more like himself then the bumbling idiot of the night before. The result was the same. She slid over and he slammed into the door again. He bounced off it, ready to continue to fight. She took him down with a sweep of her leg. She trapped his neck between her legs and he stilled, she could snap his neck easily from here. 

Awareness faded as she choked him out.

*****

This time he didn’t tumble from the pallet, his mind remembering where he was despite how horribly wrong it felt. He was hard and leaking, desperately in need of release but too well conditioned to touch himself without Quinn’s permission. His hole ached to be filled and fucked. His mouth craved the feeling of being abused viciously by Quinn’s cock.

Ward tried to curl in on himself, humping the bed blindly and scrabbling at the sheet, uncaring who saw him. He was so desperate to be forced and degraded. 

Strong hands pulled his pants down and three fingers forced their way inside him completely dry.

He cried out in need and humped back onto the fingers, the pain grounding him. This was right! This was how it should be! The pain! The pleasure! 

“Yes Ian! Please! Yes! Fuck me Ian! Fuck me hard! I’m sorry! I’m so sorry I was bad! Yes! YES!”

The fingers pushed hard against his prostate and he screamed into the pillow as he came still humping back and forth between the bed and the intrusive fingers.

He fell forwards, his face still buried in the pillow, his body twitching and his cum soaking into his boxers. The fingers slid out of him and replaced the pants over his ass.

When his heart beat finally slowed he turned with a smile, expecting to see Quinn there. Instead he saw the red head looking down at him, the same expressionless look on her face. He rolled as far away from her as he could get till he was packed into the corner looking at her. 

“Please, what do you want with me? Where’s Ian? Let me go back to him! Please, he’s- he’s my boss, he needs me to keep him safe!”

“I’m Natasha.”

“I don’t care who you are! I want Ian! Let me go to him. Please! PLEASE! He loves me! He needs me!”

He didn’t try to attack her again; he knew he was no match for her in his current state. He begged and pleaded with her and he could feel the panic rising in him again.

“You’re never going back there.”

She said it so matter of fact, like it was an unalienable truth. And then he did lunge at her. She tossed him back onto the pallet with a flick of her hand. He lunged again and she threw him back again, like he was a child. He was older then her by a couple years and easily weighed twice as much, she repelled him like he was a frisky kitten.

He resorted to begging and crying. She left him there. He pounded on the door, screaming at her to come back. 

“HE LOVES ME! HE LOVES ME! HE LOVES ME!”

Her last words echoing in his head…

“He never loved you.”

*****

He lay on the pallet looking up at the padded ceiling. Everything was padded, the floor, the walls, the ceiling, even the door. He couldn’t really hurt himself in here. He didn’t move when the door opened and closed. He didn’t even bother to look to see the expressionless face of the red headed witch.

A male voice started talking, Ward turned his head to see a well built young man sitting next to the red head. The red head held the young man’s hand, and the young man was gripping it like it was the only thing keeping him there.

They could have been brothers, Ward and this other young man- same height, same build. His name was Marcus, Ward caught that. He was a couple years older then Ward, and a good couple years older then the red head, but he held onto her like she was his life saver.

Marcus didn’t look up once as he talked. Ward had to strain to catch his words but once he did he couldn’t escape them, no matter how he tried.

Marcus relived every moment of Ward’s life with Ian. Only it wasn’t Ward living it. Marcus had been Quinn’s bodyguard before Ward, and he’d done all the same things. Ward started to scream to block out Marcus’ words, but they found him every time he had to take a breath. He clasped his hands over his ears, but the words pierced his hands like they were tissue paper earplugs.

Nothing Ward could do could make the words stop as Marcus tore apart every loving moment Quinn had ever shared with him. Every single moment of it played out from a script Quinn had perfected before Ward had ever met him. 

Ward had no idea when they left. Marcus’ words played on repeat in his head and rolled like a ticker tape in front of his eyes. Natasha’s words as well. Ward managed to turn over enough to vomit off the side of the pallet before curling up into a ball and crying himself to sleep. 

*****

He was empty. His entire life for the last year, wiped out by a red headed witch woman. He refused to eat or drink or even move, and it didn’t look like anyone even cared. 

Natasha would bring him a tray of food, and put it next to his head as he stared up at the ceiling. She’d sit quietly without moving for a half hour. Then, when he didn’t move, she’d take the tray and leave. 

She did it every few hours but Ward barely noticed her. He’d go to sleep and then wake up again to stare at the padded ceiling. He figured eventually he’d just waste away and die, he could live with that decision. 

*****

“Wake up!”

The slap woke him. That didn’t stop her from giving him another one. She was straddling him and the look in her eyes was pure dominant. 

“Lazy whore.”

She slapped him again before sliding off him.

“Hands and knees.”

He obeyed before his rational brain could process that SHE was NOT his dom. Every part of him was shaking now. He was like a drug addict going through withdrawal; he needed this so badly. 

She went to his head and picked up a large dildo and set it to his lips, “Suck it whore!”

He opened his mouth and she shoved it in hard making him gag immediately and try to pull away.

She pulled it from his mouth and slapped him hard with it, “Take it you dirty little cum dump!”

She grabbed his hair and pulled his head back so he was looking up at her.

“You are nothing but a hole for my cock. Understand?”

Ward didn’t say anything. Natasha slapped him hard.

“UNDERSTAND!”

“Yes! Yes!”

“Get your lips back on it. NOW!”

She pulled his head back to the dildo and spent the next five minutes brutally fucking his mouth. He gagged and chocked, tears leaking from his eyes…his cock leaking too.

She pushed him away and he fell off the pallet. She stood above him and inserted the dildo into the strap-on harness she was wearing. 

“Back on your knees you useless toy.”

He moved to comply, his ass facing her. She didn’t wait, she slammed into him hard, barely lubricated from his spit.

Ward’s scream filled the room. The pain was unbearable…so was his orgasm.

He crashed to the floor shaking, his cock still spurting. Natasha returned to her place sitting against the door. She seemed to have forgotten the plastic cock jutting obscenely from its harness.

She waited patiently as his breathing evened out and his body stopped shaking. When he finally looked at her she pointedly looked at the bowl of broth he hadn’t noticed before.

“Drink it.”

He crawled to the bowl and went to put his mouth to the lip of it. The sound of her hand smacking her thigh made him jump back. He looked at her, cringing away from the anger he would see. But her face held the same inscrutable look it always did (except when she was fucking him senseless).

“YOU are NOT an animal,” Her eyes went to the spoon sitting next to the bowl. He picked it up, it felt clumsy in his hand. It had been months since he’d eaten anything not fed to him by Quinn. 

It took him a couple moments to sit cross-legged, pick up the bowl and spoon and feed himself again. It felt good, every spoonful of warm broth easing his parched throat and a stomach tired of turning and heaving with bile. It felt good to be in control of his own mouth, his own food. 

That realization made all the pain and torture he’d endured come rushing back to him. His hands started to shake, he could barely keep the bowl from toppling out of his hand, let alone get a spoon to his mouth.

Small strong hands took the bowl and spoon from him before he’d managed to spill more then a couple drops. Natasha sat in front of him, and gently spoon-fed him the rest of it. He never took his eyes off her face.

“Who are you?”

She continued the slow task of bringing spoonfuls of soup to his mouth, her eyes staying on her task: bowl, mouth, bowl, mouth, bowl, mouth.

“Natasha Romanoff”

“But WHO are you?”

“A friend.”

“No, but-”

She looked up at him then and the words died in his throat. He finished the broth and she stood, the dildo still jutting from its harness. It was funny. A small laugh bubbled up from inside him and escaped. Ward choked it off as soon as it came out. Natasha looked down at him as he looked up at her. He was afraid he’d done something wrong and more then a little scared at the fact that he hadn’t even recognized the sound of his own laughter.

Natasha’s inscrutable face cracked a little and a ghost of a smile flowed across her face. Ward looked at her, speechless...if just the whisper of a smile could make her face light up, what would a full smile do to her?

And as he was thinking that she left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay.


	5. Trust Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha helps Ward get it together

She wasn’t there when he woke up. He was grateful for the solitude; more grateful that he was AWARE of the solitude as a good thing. He took stock of himself. He was weak from lack of food, but not as weak as he could be which made him wonder what was in the broth. He was drug free, safe, and warm, three things he could never count on with Quinn.

He was dirty. He wanted desperately to take a shower and use the facilities. It made him wonder how long he’d been here; after all, he hadn’t once used a bathroom since he’d come here. Yet he’d never felt the need to go, and he always woke up with clean clothes on.

He moved to the door and peered out the small window. There was no one there. He tried the door. It opened.

He gingerly stuck his head out. He was in a short corridor with the only other visible door at the end of the hall to his left.

He stepped out, leaving the door open in case he needed to rush back in. He moved slowly down the hall. He was surprised at how well lit it was. Despite the lack of windows it wasn’t the hallway of a clandestine prison somewhere. In fact…it was warm, and almost…sunny.

The other door led into an extra warm room with a tile floor and several showers taking up a side of it. Ward didn’t question it. He stripped out of his clothes and dropped them into a hamper sitting next to a shelf that held towels.

He put the water on and stood under the spray. It felt like heaven- another small pleasure he’d forgotten about. He tried to remember the last time he’d showered alone. All he could remember was Quinn throwing him into a cold shower, or hosing him down in the garden, or “loving” baths.

With those memories came the creepy crawly feeling of disgust. Ward turned the water on as hot as he could handle and scrubbed at his skin till it was red and raw. He stood there for an hour. The water never went cold as he lathered and rinsed, lathered and rinsed, over and over and over again, using up all the soap in all the dispensers.

Finally he opened his eyes and turned off the water. Standing in the water in the shower next to his was Natasha. She had her eyes closed as she washed her hair. She was gorgeous, with flawless skin that didn’t seem the least bit marred by the scars he could see on her.

He watched as the water ran down her body. Her muscles bunched and moved under her silky skin and he wanted desperately to touch her. His hand moved of its own volition till it lay gently on the curve of her hip. She opened her eyes and Ward froze, knowing he'd overstepped and that he'd be punished for his insolence.

Instead she offered him the same half smile from before and turned so that his hand slid across her back to rest against her waist. He didn't move as she continued to stand under the stream of water his eyes locked on the rivelets that tracked down her body. Only when she finally turned off the water did he look up at her.

"Will you get me a towel?"

He nodded and went to pull a towel from the shelf. He went back to her and slowly started to dry her off. He took his time, enjoying the gentleness of the act, the trust she had in him. He cupped her breasts gently with the towel and slowly moved his head to lick the beads of water off her nipples.

He kept waiting to be hit or punished but she only sighed gently as her nipple hardened in his mouth and she turned slightly to give him her other one.

Then he was drying her stomach and her back, then her ass. She opened her legs a little wider and he gently dried between her thighs. He moved so slowly, constantly on the edge of pulling back, knowing this was a cruel game she was playing and sooner or later he'd be hurt and punished. That didn't stop him.

He didn't realize he was hard until his cock brushed against her hip as he was drying her hair for the second time. He gasped at the sensation and bucked forward to leave a little trail of precum on her hip bone. He pulled back quickly; he'd surely be punished now.

She looked at him and down at her hip. She moved slowly, like he was a feral animal likely to bolt at the slightest provocation. She put her hand on his shoulder and gently pushed him down to his knees. She moved till her hip was directly in front of his mouth. He didn't hesitate to lick his slick off of her.

She gently ran her fingers through his hair as he kept it up. She smiled softly down at him as he looked up at her. She pulled him up again and took the towel from him. Now it was her turn to slowly dry Ward off.

She got a dry towel and slowly made her way down his body. His eyes never left her face as she methodically dried him from head to toe. His skin was raw and red from his scrubbing and she was so gently.

She was teasingly gentle around his nipples, licking them and then blowing gently on them making him shiver and break out in goosebumps. She did his abs and ass, and then gently squeezed his cock in the towel. He was panting and shivering, every gentle touch sure to become painful and mean.

But the pain never came. The concentration on her face never changing to something cruel or hard. When she was done she gently took his hand and led him back to his room. She lay him down on the pallet, on sheets that smelled clean and felt extra soft against his raw skin.

She lay her body slowly against his and his hands immediately went to her back. She kissed him. She was soft and light, nothing like Ian's bulk and weight. Her lips were soft and yielding. Her tongue questing not demanding.

He opened up to her. Starting to believe that maybe, just maybe this wasn't a set-up to some cruel joke. He kissed her back, enjoying the taste of her. His head snapped back as her wet cunt glided softly over his cock. She nipped at his neck as she slid her wetness over his length.

Then she was sliding lower to bite and lick at his nipples. Ward moaned at the wonderfully painful little bites and pushed up so she would bite harder. Instead she pulled away and he whimpered into the silence, his hands bruising her waist. She pushed him back down and slid her pussy back over his cock as she went back to nipping his neck; her breasts gliding over his nipples.

She slid down again, nibbling at his nipples, little sparks of pain that blazed and subsided as she nipped then licked. He wanted so desperately for her to bite harder.

Instead she slid even lower till his hard cock lay between her breasts. He bucked wildly, his eyes screwed shut and his mouth open in a silent scream at the soft warmth. He took advantage of every moment of pleasure- so sure it would be his last before she walked away, leaving him hard, needy, and desperate.

She let him buck into the valley of her breasts for a few moments, as she licked ticklish circles into his stomach. Ward was shaking as she slid lower and her breath glided over his swollen cock-head. One strong hand held him down and the other wrapped tightly around his base as she slid her mouth all the way over him.

He did scream then. The pleasure so incredibly good, so incredibly kind. He clenched wildly at the sheets, at her hair- anything that might keep him grounded. She kept her mouth on him, her tongue licking sparks of pleasure all the way up his spine to explode behind his eye lids.

He was gasping for air now, trying desperately to remember how to breath. Then she let go of his cock and it didn't matter anymore, he was cumming. He rode the wave for as long as he could, so unwilling to come down from it. Still so sure this could only end in torture and pain.

But she let him finish cumming, didn't choke him off, or twist his balls cruely. She let him come down gently, letting him find his own way back to the surface as his cock continued to spurt onto his abs. She massaged his balls gently until they were empty and when he finally stopped spurting she slid her hand away to avoid his overly sensitive package.

She lay gently beside him, her breasts pressed into his side, a leg thrown over his, a hand resting gently over his heart. She was warm and soft, everything Ian had ceased to be. Ward kept his eyes closed as his orgasm faded and his breathing and heartbeat returned to normal.

This was it, the moment that she would cage him and inform him he'd never cum again. Or she'd whip him or throw a bucket of freezing water over him. He kept his eyes closed, trying to keep from tensing up as nothing happened.

Her hand slid slowly down his chest and started making patterns in the cum spattered on his stomach. He finally dared to open his eyes and look at her. Her face was serene as she continued to play in his mess. She felt his eyes on her and looked up at him. She slid up and kissed him. Her tongue tickled his lips until he opened them and she invited his tongue to play with hers.

She was softness and light, and warmth and fire. A wave of heat flowed from her hand on his stomach and crashed over his head. He pulled her closer to him, deepening the kiss. She was pliant in his arms. He rolled them till he was above her, never breaking the kiss.

She opened her legs and he settled between them, the warmth between her thighs causing another wave of warmth to slide up his body, chasing away the cold that lay close to his bones.

He tried to invade the same space she occupied, so desperately needy of the warmth she was offering him. She didn't let him speed up, didn't let the need he felt overwhelm him to the point of viciousness and brutality. She forced him to be slow and calm as she kept all her movements gently and soft.

It was psychology at its best as she became something delicate and breakable under him. Something he knew he had to protect and shelter. He kept himself in check as he slid gently against her. Doing to her what she had done to him.

He nipped at her neck and licked circles around her nipples. He cradled her breasts and rolled her hardening nubs between his fingers between gently bites and hard sucks. He tickled her stomach with his tongue and slowly made his way between her legs.

He teased her gently, remembering what it meant to tease for pleasure and not for pain. His tongue slid over her folds and she squirmed under him, sliding her fingers in his hair and trying to pull him down farther.

He resisted and continued his slow ministrations, avoiding her clit and her hole. She became more insistent as she bucked upwards and pulled him downwards. He pulled away and gently took her hand from his head. He licked and nipped at the inside of her wrist making her gasp. Then he licked up each finger before sliding it in his mouth and swirling his tongue around it.

She sobbed at the sensation, so aware that his tongue could be doing that to her pussy. When he'd done every finger he gently put her hand on the bed and she curled it desperately into the sheets. He went back to his gently teasing and she became undone above him.

Finally he spread her folds and slid his tongue inside her. He didn't know which one of them was more desperate, him or her. She screamed as his tongue found her entrance and she ground desperately into his mouth wanting more. He loved the taste of her, and never wanted this moment to end.

He slid his tongue in and out of her as she bucked up over and over again. Her hand went to her clit and he pulled it away as she moaned. He kept tongue fucking her until he thought she would fall to pieces above him. He slid his tongue up to her clit and flicked it gently. She came with a scream as she held his tongue against her.

When she let go of his head he pulled away quickly, well aware of the sensitivity she'd be experiencing. He put his body next to hers and half covered her as she came down from her orgasm. It was only when she bucked against him that he realized that her pleasure had made him hard again.

She noticed it to, her eyes still half lidded and her breath still evening out. She purred and climbed on top of him and sank deliciously down. Ward curled in on himself, grabbing her thighs and shaking violently at how good it felt. She grabbed his head and forced his lips to hers and breathed steadily into him until his lungs unlocked and he was able to take a shuddering breath on his own.

His body unlocked and he slammed back onto the bed as she ever so slowly lifted herself up and came back down on him. She did it again and again, riding beautifully above him as he watched her move.

Then he was turning them so she was the one on the bed and he was over her gliding in and out of her as she ran her fingers up and down his back to grab his ass and pull him farther in.

Her movements became more erratic. Her breath more hitched. He watched as she came, her nails digging wonderfully into his back. Her muscles pulsed around him and he could feel his own impending orgasm.

She gasped as his hips stuttered and beads of sweat popped up on his brow. She forced him to look her in the eyes as he came inside her and she held him there as he collapsed on top of her. She kissed his forehead as he lay there and gently ran her hands through his hair.

He couldn't remember the last time an orgasm hadn't involved pain and terror, humiliation and submission. He fell asleep peacefully with her arms wrapped around him, his cock inside her, and her light chasing away the darkness.

His dreams were filled with Ian and the nauseating feeling of knowing he'd be punished when Quinn found out he'd let someone else touch him. That this was all a test Quinn had set up and he had failed miserably.

He begged wildly in his dreams. But Quinn refused to look at him, refused to acknowledge him. Quinn pushed a button and Ward fell through a trap door screaming to land on a trash heap.

Ward woke up sweating and screaming. He tried to pull away from Natasha but she held him against her, wrapping her limbs around him to keep him close.

"I've got you. He can't touch you, he'll never touch you again."

Ward grabbed onto her and held on for dear life. She kept repeating the same thing over and over again, "I've got you. He can't touch you, he'll never touch you again.I've got you. He can't touch you, he'll never touch you again."

Ward hid his head in her hair and wept.

"I want him to touch me! I NEED him to touch me!"

His body shook with need and want, screaming for the pain and dominance Quinn provided.

Sometime during the night he'd slid out of her and Natasha took a moment to slide his soft cock back inside her. She rolled gently against him and he got harder and harder.

"You don't need him, you never did. Look at me Grant."

She'd never said his name before, he hadn't even been sure she knew it. He pulled his head from her shoulder and ground himself in the calm surety of her eyes. She continued to move slowly against him.

"You are NOT some worthless toy to be played with and discarded. You are beautiful and strong and HE is not worthy of YOU. Not the other way around."

He didn't speak, just let her move slowly against, never looking away from her eyes.

"Do I feel good?"

He nodded.

"Does it hurt?"

He shook his head.

"Pleasure and pain don't have to go together."

"I-I liked it. I liked the pain."

She smiled and kissed him, biting his lip, making him moan and try to deepen the kiss. She pulled back.

"It can be good, so good, pain and pleasure together. But don't confuse the pleasure of pain with not being worthy. You can find someone who can give that to you without taking away who you are."

"L-like you?"

She smiled her half smile and kissed him gently. She made slow love to him till he fell asleep again. Only in the morning, waking up alone, did Ward realize she hadn't answered him.

****

This shower was shorter, less hot and less raw. While he was toweling off Natasha came in and passed him some sweats with a bird emblem on it. He put them on without question and followed him out of the world he'd known for the last couple of days.

They exited into a long hallway with doors spaced out evenly on either side. It was louder here, noises filtering out from behind the doors. Ward flinched a little, other people, other Quinns, other pains....

Natasha moved closer to him till he could smell the sunshine of her hair and the softness of her arm.

She led him to a door and put her palm to the scanner. The door clicked open and she led him inside. He moved passed her as she closed the door. As he turned to her only his forgotten skills saved him from her punching him HARD across the jaw.

As it was he deflected only the majority of her punch before falling backwards. He looked up at her in confusion and fear.

"Well that's something at least," Was all she said before she started to attack him in earnest. He did his best to protect himself but he was rusty and slow. There was a great deal more running and pushing her away then actual martial ability. But ever so slowly little things came back to him. It didn't hurt that she never hit him any harder then she knew he could take, though he was sure she could have killed him a million times over by now.

Finally she put him down on his back for good, gasping for breath. She straddled him, pulling down his pants. It took less then five seconds before he was hard for her and she rode him, sweaty and beautiful above him. He came inside her as she shuddered above him.

She looked down at him with a cat's smile.

"That's the last one you get until you can take me down."

She grinned at his groan of defeat and softened the words with a kiss.

"Come on, shower, food. They do a body good."

"So does sex." He said sullenly.

Ward was blown away by her laugh.

"I knew you were in there somewhere."

Ward froze at that. He'd spoken without thinking of the consequences. For the first time in a year, not afraid that there would be any.

She kissed the frozen look off his face and pulled him up.

And that more or less set the course his days would take for the following days. He woke up, had breakfast. Natasha would find him, trounce him handily in the sparring room, they'd shower and have lunch, then conditioning, then shower, dinner and falling back into bed, to repeat it the next day.

He got better, stronger, he never managed to beat Natasha, but he didn't acquire so many bruises either. He was a quick learner and his body desperately WANTED to remember its training.

Two weeks later, after a particularly hard day of sparring and conditioning, Ward was lying prone on his back in bed, hurting.....everywhere. He'd taken the hottest shower he could coax from the pipes before falling naked onto his bed.

He barely had the energy to turn his head as Natasha came into the room. He smiled at her.

"It hurts even to smile." He said, wanting her to join in on the joke.

She didn't say anything, just stood above him. He finally noticed she was wearing her harness and he watched as she put the dildo into place.

His body tensed up, causing every muscle in his body to scream in pain.

"Turn over."

"Natasha."

She didn't hit him or so much as move. She waited patiently and he got the distinct impression she could wait forever.

He obeyed, his muscles screaming. She was behind him then, a hand on his back letting him know exactly where she was. She kissed his neck and down his spine. She massaged his shoulders and the screaming muscles of his back.

She moved down his ass, kneading it deeply and making him whimper as she massaged the muscles of his glutes.

"On your knees."

Ward was slow to obey, his muscles looser but still painful. She kept both hands on his waist, helping to pull him up. He gritted his teeth as memories of Quinn tried to swamp him.

Natasha was NOT Quinn, she never hurt him without cause. WANTED him to laugh and joke. WANTED him to be himself. At the same time he'd gone to sleep every night with an ache in his chest, something was missing.

And now Natasha was here, ordering him to do what she wanted. Expecting him to obey without question. And it clicked for Ward. EVERY day had been like this. Natasha said to do something and he did it without question. She owned him, and yet she didn't ask him to lose himself.

He came back from this realization when she put a slicked up finger inside him. He hadn't had anything inside him since the first time she'd fucked him with her strap-on. He moaned and pushed back on the finger, wanting it deeper.

Natasha complied and slowly brushed against his prostate. He whimpered and moved back and forth on her digit.

Natasha added a second and then a third, slowly opening him up, making him feel so good as he rutted like a bitch in heat.

She scissored him open, the stretch a blissful pain. She didn't even pull her fingers out as she placed the dildo head at his entrance, she didn't leave him empty for even a second as she replaced her fingers with the tip of her toy.

He was so grateful for that. Now that he had something inside him again, he never wanted to be empty again. As she slid the dildo inside him she also took her lube-slicked fingers and gently wrapped them around his cock. She let him set the pace as he fucked himself between her dildo and hand.

He took it slow, unwilling to let it end, not afraid that she'd pull away before letting him finish. Sore muscles bunched and strained till they couldn’t hold him anymore and his arms gave way, pulling him off her cock.

It was torture being empty. He tried to get his arms to support him again, questing backwards for her cock. Instead she turned him over and grabbed his legs folding him up so she could access him again. He grabbed his knees and held them for her.

He watched her slowly put her cock back inside him, moving slowly as she slid in till she bottomed out. She leaned forward and kissed his eyes and he kept them closed as she moved inside him. He relaxed into the pleasure, no terror, no fear, just pleasure and blissful wonderful stretching pains. 

Natasha watched him close his eyes and fall into the rhythm of her fucking. There was no fear creasing his forehead or clenched in the muscles of his shoulder. He wasn’t watching her with the shadowed look of someone waiting for the hammer to fall; or flinching away from her hands moving across his body.

He trusted her. She knew he’d have to deal with the demon of Quinn in his mind soon enough, but for now, for the time being, this trust was enough….

She concentrated all of her skill into giving him the most pleasure she could, maybe it would hurt less when she betrayed that trust.


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for the mislead.

I won't say I have DEFINITELY abandoned this fic- there's so much left to be done....But I'm not feeling the inspiration to write it....so....Sorry about that. I might get to it eventually. One day. 

 

~fabledexile

**Author's Note:**

> This will revolve around Ian Quinn being a no-good-very-bad dom and screwing with Ward's head...and body.
> 
> If there is a kink you'd like to see just let me know.


End file.
